Tuesday, October 23, 2007
so i guess i won't be a 23 year old virgin.
jenn jenn
Saturday, October 20, 2007
is it possible that i've found my match? maybe, maybe.
time to pack, later.
jennifer
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
anyways, i have a chem quiz to study for, so peace bitches.
oh yeah, i found the perfect halloween costume. it's gonna be hot. it's not a cop or a french maid like my first two choices. as soon as this party comes around, i'll be sure to post pictures of it. i'm so excited.
anyways, all right then, i'm gonna get back to it. you ain't talking about nothing anyways.
love ya,
jennifer a.
Monday, October 15, 2007
anyways, i've been having weird dreams lately. the other day, i dreamt i had my contacts in and that i cut out my pupil and iris in one eye and placed it in between the glass in a monocle. my eye still looked normal though and when i wore the monocle, it wasn't even clear...it was blurry. so after a while, i was like, "wtf? why did i do that? i can't even see now." so it was weird.
i have a crush on a new dude now. it was a different dude a couple weeks ago, now it's this 20 year old dude. we've been talking almost every night. the guy i'm gonna ask to go with me to this halloween thing.
i dropped calculus. i'm gonna clep out though. i wish i had known about clep before. well i did, i'm just so damn lazy.
seven years from now, i WILL be a doctor...that's a bet. and i'm planning on moorehouse school of medicine here in atlanta or the university of new mexico in albuquerque. those are the two that i want to apply to. i'd be happy to get into either. i'm working my ass off now though. wish me luck.
all right then, my head is throbbing, i just got my hair done. i'm gonna take an aspirin and go to bed. peace.
jenny
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
Saturday, October 06, 2007
Friday, October 05, 2007
and i am so tired of people i know telling other people that i'm a virgin. excuse me, but that's my business, and other people don't need to be volunteering my business. i'm not ashamed of it or anything, but geeze louise. it's enough already.
ok then, well i have to get on this studying. peace out.
jenny
Monday, October 01, 2007
so i've been lifting weights and doing these ab exercises and chest presses and leg presses. after the first session, i didn't feel a thing. but after the second day, my body was aching all over and it hasn't stopped since. it's been three weeks. but i know in the end it'll all pay off. i'm trying to get my body on point for when i start having sex...which will hopefully be one day soon.
i need a full body rub down in the worst way....with a happy ending (if you know what i mean). maybe i'll indulge and pay for a massage from the ymca...but they're like $70. but why pay when i can get one for free (you picking up what i'm putting down?)
anyways, i'm so lame...i better go.
ohhh, wait. the drama that is my life. ok, well i used to have about three, three and a half dudes that were "potentials". ok, so one, daniel, doesn't like me anymore because some shitty reason. because i couldn't tell that he was joking about not hanging out with me or something silly like that. but whatever, i don't have time for trivial shit like that in my life anyway. two, darnell. all i have to say about darnell, the "potential" with the most potential, is "put your ho on a leash, cause bitch is running wild". new jersey girls are crazy! it's not even that serious. they get a guy and they turn into stalkers. and, supposedly, they get all possessive like this without even sleeping with the dude (yeah right, do i look stupid to you?). they had to have something put on them for them to act like that.
but i see my problem. i'm trying to get with guys who i already have some sort of history with. that's problem number one. i need to start fresh and talk to somebody brand new....from atlanta. i called myself trying to slow down with the dating for one of those dudes, or maybe both, but i see now i need to jump myself back into the game. i realize that i'm gonna end up with someone who's not one of the three dudes i have a history with.
the third dude, lamar, isn't a potential. i just thought he should be added to the list. i had a dream the other night about him. i dreamt that he told me that he loved me over the phone and i just laughed at him and scoffed and brushed it off then hung up. i don't know what that was about. you know, i never thought there'd be a time where i wasn't in love with lamar...but i can honestly say that i'm not in love with lamar. i don't love the dude. he's just a dude to me. that's kinda sad, but i guess not really. i don't even have love for him like that. i mean, he's an all right dude. as a boyfriend, he sucks ass, (literally, no let me stop, i'm just kidding), and as a friend, he's only all right. but anyways, that's it. i swear i'm not gonna say another word about that dude in my blog again. that's my past. i need to look toward the future. and i don't need to write about darnell or daniel either.
besides, there's this dude at my school that i have a crush on. it's funny. i haven't had a crush in years. and it's not the asian dude, even though he's cute (and its so weird to me that an asian dude would like me like that...an 18 year old asian dude at that). it's this other dude in one of my classes. he's hispanic or something. i think he's pretty young too though, but as long as he's 18, it's all good. he's not really cute, so i don't know why i like him, but we're always talking in class and getting yelled out for talking. i need to stop. messing with these little boys. i love his laugh though, and his smile.
a-n-y ways! i'm gonna go to downtown now. i have to meet with my advisor. so i'll holla bitches.
jenny
Saturday, September 29, 2007
i've had my costume planned out for months now...i just have to get the costume now. i'm gonna be a sexy cop. it's so hard to find the perfect costume though. i've been looking though. the thing is, shae wanted to go as a cop too. uh oh. oh well, we can both go as cops. it'll be great. i'll try to look for something else, but i have my heart set on being the cop.
i want the dark blue suit with the booty shorts and the shirt and badge and cuffs and hand and boots and maybe the shades, walkie talkie and baton. i'm trying to go all out. me and shae are going shopping for our costumes tomorrow, so now i just have to find somebody to go with. i still have a whole month, i'll ask someone.
oh yeah, i think i'm gonna drop calculus this semester. i've failed everything in the class so far, so i think that unless i want to f up my gpa, i need to go ahead and let it go.
ok then, that's enough for tonight. my head is banging. i'm out bitches.
jenny
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Saturday, September 15, 2007
Thursday, September 13, 2007
what's up?
i'm thinking about dropping my calculus class unless things start looking up. if i keep going at this same rate, i'm gonna fail that class. all my other classes, i know i'm gonna make an A or a B in...definitely...but calculus sucks.
i'm 'talking' to someone...kinda. i just realized it yesterday when he said it, but i guess it's true. i'm 'talking' to someone. getting to know them to see if there's something more. we'll see where it goes.
oh...and i finally bought that drum set i've wanted for years. i bought one on ebay for $415...well, my brother alan paid for half of it...and i'm picking it up saturday. it's an 8 piece PEACE chrome drum set. it comes with all the snare drums and the bass drum and the hi hat and cymbals and hardware and throne. i'm so excited to get that into my room and start it up. i think i may need to go get my own sticks though. i'm jumping out of my skin right now.
i'm bout to go...you ain't even talking about nothing.
peace out bitch.
jenny jenn jenn
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
nothing new really going on with me. i've been single for a year now and i'm feeling it now. i finally feel like lamar doesn't even want me anymore. and after five, six years of knowing him, i think this is the first time that he's just like, "whatever" about me. oh well. i did try.
i'm finally starting to be outgoing. i made a couple new friends at ga state. of course they're not girls. i never make new girlfriends. they're dudes. every single one of them. it's cool cause now i have someone to walk with me to marta (my new friend tom). it's great. i feel kinda dirty though cause i kinda like him, but he's only 18!!! i knew this would happen. i'm not really into younger dudes, but this dude is all right.
darnell. what can i say about darnell? we'll see where it goes with that. maybe nowhere, maybe somewhere.
daniel. what can i say about daniel? daniel is...what can i say about daniel? he's really been showing me a good time since i came back to atlanta. he lets me hang with him and study with him at georgia tech, so that's cool. i appreciate that.
i don't really have a crush on anyone right now. i think there's a lot of cute dudes at state, but no one worth pursing right now. oh well, i guess my single-dom will have to hold for a little while longer. but i'd really like to be with someone before this year is over with...maybe. that's only three months away, but we'll see. i won't jump into anything or rush anything just to meet the deadline.
besides that, school is all right. a little overwhelming with the classes i'm taking now, but all right. as a matter of fact, i have my first calculus exam tomorrow, so i better go study. 8 am to 10 pm tomorrow. geeze louise! my brother will be here this weekend, so i won't get to hang out with my buddy daniel this week. i haven't been this busy in a long long time. it's fun.
all right then, i'm out bitches.
peace,
jenny.
Monday, August 27, 2007
how about this dude i went out with a couple times just popped up yesterday to where i live...uh...not cool. he's already showing stalker potential, i better cut him loose. i swear to god he calls me like 4 or 5 days a week. too much. you would have think i gave him some or something...but nope...i just got it like that. time to move on to the next couple of potentials. i've been giving out my number and talking to dudes and getting numbers, but haven't really gotten the guts to call anyone yet.
school work is tough...but mostly the calculus...but i'm getting back into the swing of things.
i'm happy at where i'm at in my life right now...i need to keep up the work.
more later.
peace out.
jenny
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
school's going good. i just added a sixth class. i'm trying to play catch up, so...i have the maximum number of hours allowed at georgia state. if i keep this up and work through my summers, i can graduate in 2009. i need to look into taking the CLEP for some of my required classes. oh yeah, and the price of books is murder. but whatever, it has to be done.
and these georgia boys! wow. i'm in love already. the guys down here are just gorgeous. i'm meeting dudes and getting and receiving numbers. this dude just yesterday came up to me and tried to holla...and i had my glasses on! dudes really rarely holla at me when i'm wearing my glasses, but these are my newer, cuter glasses, so maybe that's why. so i'm feeling all right right now.
all right then, peace out.
jennifer
Friday, August 17, 2007
anyways, i need to go finish doing what i do.
peace,
jennifer
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
i was watching the history channel and that's the day the world is supposedly gonna end...according to a lot of people. especially the mayans. they predicted, hundreds of years ago, that 2012 would be the end of the world. some say it's gonna be a huge comet, some say it'll be a natural disaster (floods, global earthquakes and tsunamis and storms), and some say it'll be man made (war, bombs). but maybe they're just picking the number because of all the 12's (12/21/12). nostradamus and the oracles...they predicted a lot of crap a long time ago that's coming true now. but they never find out until the event actually happens, so i think it's a load of crap. anyone can make those predictions.
but anyway, the point is, i need to get laid within the next five years. hopefully sooner rather than later, so i can actually enjoy more sex. i can't believe i took five minutes out of my life talking about this.
peace.
jennifer
Monday, August 06, 2007
anyways, since i moved out of my apartment, i have been so bored here at my dad's. i don't even know what to do with myself. but i'll be spending my last few days here trying to hook up with old friends before i go to atlanta. i can't wait to start classes. i'm so ready. i bought a bunch of school supplies, a few clothes, i have a new hairstyle (can't do the weave anymore, not really my style, i like to keep it real). i may have to start rocking the fro more often (i'm trying to let my hair grow back since it was acting up a couple months ago and just broke off like crazy). but i'll be all right.
i've actually been glancing at online personals. i'm so ashamed. i don't like being single. i need a guy in my life. but i'm so sure, that before this year is over with, i'll at least have someone in mind. atlanta is filled with a bunch of good looking guys.
anyways, i'm about to bounce. i may go see a movie, get some more new clothes, go get a hamster (yes, i'm serious), all that good stuff. peace bitches.
jenny
Thursday, August 02, 2007
(i prob wont die, but these are some good ideas!)
1-touch her waist
2-talk to her
3-share secrets
4-give her your jacket
5-kiss them slowly
6-hug her
7-hold her
8-laugh with her
9-invite her somewhere
10-let her be with you when your with your friends
11-smile with her
12-take pics with her
13-pull her onto your lap
14-when she says she loves you more, deny it. fight back
15-when her friends say i love her more than you, deny it. fight back and hug her tight so she cant get to her friends. it makes her feel loved
16-always hug her and say i love you when you see her
17-kiss her unexpectedly
18-hug her from behind around the waist
19-tell her she's beautiful not sexy!
20-tell her the way you feel about her!
21-kiss her on the lips
22-DONT ask her to buy you stuff. you buy HER stuff.
23-TELL HER WHAT FEELS GOOD
24-make her feel loved
25-buy her stuff. like small things can still help
26-don't lie to her
27-dont cheat on her
28-take her anywhere she wants
29-messege her in the morning and tell her have a good day at school/work, and how much you miss her
30-be there for her when ever she needs you, even though she doesn't need you just be there so she'll know that she can always count on you
31. Hold her close when she's cold and she can hold you too.
32. When you are alone hold her close and kiss her.
33. Kiss her on the tip of her nose; (it will give her the hint that you want to kiss her).
34. While in the movie, put your arm around her and then she will automatically put her head on your shoulder, then lean in and tilt her chin up and kiss her lightly.
35. When she complains that her neck/shoulders hurts massage them for her.
36. When people diss her, stand up for her.
37. Look deep into her eyes and tell her you love her.
38. Lay down under the stars and put her head on your chest so she can listen to the steady beat of your heart, Link your fingers together while you whisper to her as she rests her eyes and listens to you.
39. When walking next to each other grab her hand.
40. When you hug her hold her in your arms as long as possible
41. call her at night to wish her sweet dreams.
42. Comfort her when she cries and wipe away her tears.
43. Take her for long walks at night.
44. Always Remind her how much you love her.
now all of these are true, but the ones i marked in red are the ones i like the most. i need to find the guy that can do all of that for me. not too much to ask for right?
i had always hoped to be married with kids by the time i was 25 or 26. i wanted, no, i still want like 8 kids. as many as i can have. but here i am, a 22 year old virgin...probably a 23, 24, 25 year old virgin. it's becoming more and more clear to me how sad that is. i wish i had the courage to go through with it. i really do wish i could just do it, but i just have issues with it. ohh...one day.
i'm trying to get serious here. i need to get on the ball. if i'm 30 and still alone, i need to go ahead and kill myself i think. but they say, sex and marriage can still be good after 30 and you can still have kids well into your 50s and 60s. no rush for me i guess. if it happens, then it happens. if it doesn't...then i adopt and learn how to masturbate (and i have tried it once or twice, but it never works out for me--maybe my problem is worse than i thought, but it'll be fun trying...i'll get it eventually).
love, jenny
love, jenny
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
and today, wow. i did most of my work today. i think i sweated off ten pounds today with all of the running around i did. but at least i'm done. i'm really really sad about my apartment though. i'm done, gone from it. i really need to get a job so i can get my own place soon when i move back to atlanta. i've been looking for a third shift data entry job...which atlanta has tons of. i'm crossing my fingers.
anyways, my body is so so sore. my back and my arms and shoulders. i really did work myself these last two days. i'm in pain. i need to soak in a nice warm tub. but it feels weird, like i have no home right now. school starts in two and a half weeks and i should end up in atlanta in the coming next few days. we'll see how it all turns out. i know i'll be all right though. i'm in good hands...my own.
all right then, i need to rest. peace out.
jenny
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Monday, July 23, 2007
anyway, i'm finally done. every single thing is packed and away in a box, marked and taped up. now i pick up the truck on wednesday and move my crap. thank god. i'm so ready to go and get this done.
anyways, it's almost 11, i need to go showers, no bathe, because i packed up my shower curtain and shower head, pick out my work clothes for tomorrow, brush my teeth then go to bed.
oh...i finally get my new glasses on thursday. i think i wrote about it already, but i'm getting an eye exam for glasses and contacts and getting maybe two pairs of glasses and two boxes of contacts. that's gonna set me back about $300 or so. i'm gonna be so broke next month. that's really the only thing i'm stressing about. hopefully things will work out for me.
ok, i'm out. peace.
jenny jenn jenn
Sunday, July 22, 2007
next weekend, i have to see 'the simpsons movie' and 'i know who killed me'. but i don't know if i'm gonna see them here or in atlanta. i want to go ahead and move to atlanta, but i need to stay and work and get a few extra bucks in my pocket because i'm going broke fast. i have to pay $950 to break my lease, $168 for the moving truck, $91 for the rental car to get back home...money money money money. no one wants to hire me in atlanta. i swear, the first offer i get, i'm taking and i'm moving down to atlanta the next day. i'm starting to hate charlotte. so many bad memories. the sooner i can leave the better.
ok, peace out. i'm gone. i need to arrange my boxes cause my aunts and cousins will be here in a few hours.
love,
jenny
Saturday, July 21, 2007
so two of my aunts are coming to charlotte/fort mill tomorrow. i'm excited about seeing them and about them seeing my apartment, even though it's all just boxes. i don't know how long they're staying. and then two of my brothers, alan and c.j. will be here mid august, but i'll be gone by the time they come around. it's so sad. all this good stuff is finally happening in charlotte, but i have to leave. my brothers are coming, i've gotten three really good job offers here. i've applied for so many jobs in atlanta and haven't gotten a single call back yet. i'm still hopeful though.
hopefully i can get a third shift, full time job. that'll be perfect for me. and then i can buy a house. after i save up for a year or two first though for a down payment and all that good stuff. listen to me, i'm so grown.
anyways, that's it. the powerball numbers are coming on soon, so i'm gonna watch that, close up a few more boxes, then go to bed. i have to go greet my aunts tomorrow. they're driving up from florida. that's a long ride. so anyway, peace out.
jennifer
Friday, July 20, 2007
and it looks like i'm going to be able to see on thursday. i get my new eye exam, glasses and contacts, finally! i put my contacts in or put on my glasses and i still can't see. i've had the same pair of glasses for the past seven years though, so that's probably why. you're supposed to get them changed every year. my vision is so bad. i think i may be legally blind. i can't see a thing unless it's right up on me. i'm seriously considering getting lasik eye surgery. they let you do monthly payments of like $30, so that might be my next move.
anyways, i'm gonna go. i have a lot to do this weekend. peace out.
jenn jenn
Thursday, July 19, 2007
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
and NOTE TO SELF: don't give out my number anymore to weirdos. i gave this dude my number a) because i just wanted him to get out of my face and b) because i wasn't really thinking about it when he asked me and i just gave it to him. so this loser calls me like the same time twice a day, blows up my phone, and just won't take the hint. i need to stop being nice and indulging these losers in my conversation. giving them false hope. now i need to change my number because this dude is stalker material. thank god he doesn't know where i leave (hopefully). i create nothing but stalkers baby.
i need a boyfriend. i'm a relationship kind of gal (i think i said that before). i like having a boyfriend and someone tellling me that they love me and someone holding my hand and someone i can always talk to and someone who will always listen to me, my ride or die dude... i want it, but i'm in no rush to find it. i'm willing to shop around and do a lot of dating before i try to get serious with one guy. maybe i need to stay single for a little bit longer, but fuck it, i've been single for almost a year now. i need to be in a relationship. my next boyfriend is out there waiting for me to find him.
anyways, i'm done now. peace out bitches.
ahh...i'm bored, so i'll keep typing.
my list of top ten qualities i'm looking for in my next boo:
1. a good kisser
2. honesty
3. faithfulness
4. a smart guy
5. a guy who will put me first
6. big hands, cause i like interlacing big hands in my small ones.
7. someone who will pay...at least 80% of the time...geeze louise!
8. a guy that will say (and mean it) that they'd chose me if they could chose to be with any girl in the world.
9. nice, big warm body, no skinny dudes
10. respect
maybe not in that order, but you get the point. you know i realized that when i fall in love, i really fall in love. i've only been in love once (what the hell was i thinking with that one?) and it just really f-ed me up. i'm going to be so paranoid with my next boyfriend, but hopefully he'll make me comfortable enough with him where i won't have to question everything he does and says. i need to stop talking about this now. ok, i'm out. i need to close up these boxes. i'm moving in less than a week! finally. ok, holla.
jenn
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
i woke up at 3 this morning and couldn't stop puking. it was gross. maybe i really am pregnant.
peace out.
jenny
Monday, July 16, 2007
Sunday, July 15, 2007
i had a good weekend. i spent nine hours with my dad and mattie on saturday riding almost every ride at carowinds and i literally stayed in bed all day sunday and only got up to walk the dudes and check my email. it was great.
i have a week and a half before the big move. it's kinda bittersweet. i'm only moving my stuff for now, but i'll be moving down maybe like a week before school starts in august. sooner if i get a call back from some of these jobs i applied for. i'm crossing my fingers.
and i was thinking...i have wasted so much money on rent. i might as well buy a house...a foreclosed house is cheaper. i can invest in a small house, and if i ever leave atlanta at one point, which i more than likely will, then i can always either sell it or rent it out. that actually sounds like a really good idea. so whenever i do decide to move out of vickey's, that's what i'm gonna do. hopefully i can get a nice house inside of atlanta. and after i graduate med school, i'll buy a very large house in buckhead, but hopefully live in new mexico.
but i'm bored now and i want to get back into bed. peace bitches.
jenny
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
Monday, April 16, 2007
Black Man Laws
1. It aint no fun unless we all get some.
2.Under no circumstances that a nigga should admit that the child is his (especially if he is a athlete or performer)
3.If two or more niggas arrive at a party in a single whip and if the driving negro picks up a freak then revert to rule number 1 for the rest of passengers.
4.If your homeboy is dumped by a freak you have the privledge to fuck her imediatley based on the circumstances that you were fucking her already.
5.Never turn a hoe into a housewife.
6.Hoes don't act right.
7.Girls have two visits to a guys room or living quarters without vaginal contact before all visiting priviledges are terminated.
8.It is acceptable to have sex with white females........As long as black females don't find out.
9.Every black male must have seen one of the following movies: Friday,Boyz n The Hood,Belly,Menace To Society,In Too Deep,Scarface
10.During the viewing of pornographic materials with associates there must be complete silence unless an extradornary feat has occured or revision of said feat is needed for further review.
11.When attending an Caucasian social event take full advantage of the stereotypical genitalia size.
12.You are permitted one accidental step on a man's shoe unless they are J's or brand new forces then the owner of the defaced shoe has the right to pursue imediate action.(Whoop your monkey ass)Exception to law is in the club where the number is bumped up to 2.5.
14.Atleast equivalency of four pieces of chicken must be consumed each week. Wings,fingers,tenders, and patties are all excepted.
15.You don't have to like a man to except his chicken.
16.Once the chicken has reached a man's plate, napkin, or box it belongs to him and if anyone disturbs it they are subject to extreme punishment.
17.No matter what anyone says your grandmother makes the best fried chicken.
18.No matter what anyone tells you as a child you aregoing to play professional athletics.
19.If said child in rule number two is confirmed yours it is your legal duty to ensure that the name of said child is not lexus, peaches, aquafina, mercedes, valkriesha, or any other form of foreign car,edible objects, and hoodish quality names.
20.HOOD RAT WARNINGS!!!!All of these prefixes or suffixes contained in a females name should be approached with caution:isha,niqua,ika,avia,mika,nika,nisha,tasha,wanda,La,Sha,Ta,Ma,Ra,A,
21. FUBU and dada should no longer be worn
22. When judging ones hair in a length contest it is always acceptable to inquire ones grade of hair
23. A man is only allowed to use one ingredient in his hair to achieve his wave status
24. If a man is ever to deface another man's fresh white tee, then said man in question is subject to extreme punishment
25. No red liquid should be handle around a white tee
26. If anything is obtained in excess avert to rule number 1
27. 21-0 is skunk in Madden
28. Every black male should remember the video tip drill
29. When pussy calls you must go
30. If flavor flav can have that many females trying to compete for his company then any nigga can have that many females competing for there company
31. No withholding of freak information
32. Under no cirmcumstance should you ever enter maritial status with a caucasion female
33. No matter how much we want to use it, it is not acceptable to use shawty or hay girl as a way to pursue the opposite sex to come conversate with us
34. It acceptable to to tell a black female that is with a caucasian male "that white boy aint hittin it right"
35. When dealing with females of different races always inquire the phrase "once you go black you never go back"
36. As a black male you must stick to one drink and a back up for just incase, never abide by the law of just getting fucked up on anything
37. At the moment you read this as a black male please take a moment of silence for the memory of the BET show UNCUT
38. In some cases it is acceptable to fornicate with a female solely based on ass size
Saturday, April 14, 2007
well i'm gonna love tomorrow. it's gonna be storming all day. sadness. oh well, i'll get over it.
i'm so bored, it's making me so depressed. well, nothing left to do now but sleep. gotta wait till 11 though so i can see the numbers for poweball. i am so freakin lame.
peace out bitches.
jenny
Friday, April 13, 2007
DAMN!
might as well catch up on my sleep then i guess. that's my only option at this point.
jenny
Thursday, April 12, 2007
i wasn't mad at the time, but i'm kinda ticked off about it now. not the sex part. lamar is a slut. i only expected the worse from him. he could probably get sex from any dick-faced monkey, hell, i could get sex from any dick faced monkey. so that really wasn't anything to brag about. he was mad cause he forever missed out on all of this (i'm conceited, i know). he'll never get a taste of what i got. he'll just have to settle for whatever girl with low self esteem who will give it up to him. sad. even though he did that, i'm in no rush to get it on.
but enough about the sex part. i'm just mad that that son of a bitch told me to get over him...and called me a loser! i'm sorry to sound white right now, but AS-IF! that negro has me mixed up with something else. he must have forgot that HE'S always been the one to BEG ME to give him another chance the many times HE fucked up. not the other way around. i never once told him "i want you back, i'll do better. i want to be with you. i fucked up." no way.
and he called ME a loser. what about me says LOSER? he lost his mind that day. i think i just hurt his feelings with that nasty nasty nasty email i wrote. i was pissed off and wrote a HATEful email to him. and i did feel a little bad after i sent it, but when i got his reply, i was like, feel bad for what? he's done nothing but fuck up with me. i really need to stop thinking about all that shit. it just makes me madder and madder.
i can't wait to get the hell away from this city. and that bitch still owes me 200 bucks. i, again being stupid and in love, tried to help him out and with his car payment and he has yet to pay me back. but they say, when someone owe's you money, and they don't pay you back...when you ask for the money back and that person starts to ignore you, that money you gave them paid them off to never ask you for anything else again. so, basically, it cost me $200 to get that dude out of my life. that's pretty pricy, but i guess it's worth it. but i swear, one day, one way or another, i'm gonna get that money back.
anyways...i'm done. i'm getting myself worked up again. they say when two people go out for a long time, and they break up, that the break up is usually really ugly. me and lamar are arch nemesis now. he has replaced vickey's ex-boyfriend darius as my number one enemy and being on my hit list is not the place to be, let me tell you.
enough bitching, i'm gonna get some packing done. peace out.
jenny
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
still no word on uncc. no worries. my mind is made up.
oh yeah, i totally forgot all about this. but like four weeks ago, when lamar was just moving out. i was checking my myspace and whatever and i see i have a new friend request from TANGO from I LOVE NEW YORK. so i'm trying to play it cool. i respond back to him with something like 'thanks for adding me babes' (i got that babes mess from darnell). so anyways, he actually responded to me. and we actually talked to each other back and forth for a couple weeks. he said i was "stunning". i cannot believe this homeboy was actually talking to me. and i was talking to him. so anyways, i guess him and new york aren't engaged anymore. i would hope not with what he was talking to me about. and then he has all these half naked chicks on his friend list. but i guess that doesn't matter to some dudes huh? but i'm pretty sure tiffany wouldn't have any of that.
and i just realized that i am a very jealous girlfriend. i mean, i was so paranoid with lamar, that he was cheating on me. but i had reason, he actually was cheating on me. so i guess i wasn't really a paranoid, psychotic bitch after all. cause i was never jealous with an of my other boyfriends and hopefully the next dude won't get me acting like that. but that was a scary thing to be. extremely jealous like that. really not healthy. let's not let that happen anymore.
you know, when i move to atlanta, or maybe even before, i'm gonna retire this blog. i mean, it feels good to be able to write down how i feel when i'm ticked off, but if i keep it, i'll still be holding onto stuff that i don't need to be taking with me to atlanta. i need a clean slate when i leave here. those handfull of people that do read it, i talk to them anyways, so it'll be all good. maybe i'll start a different one up one day, but this one's time is running out really soon.
ok, enough f'ing around. peace bitches.
jenn jenn
well, now that everyone's all confused, i'm out.
jennifer
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
have you seen the Rutgers girl's basketball captain? woahhh!!! i had to do a double take. i didn't know if i was look at a human or a great ape. now that's lamar's kind of chick. i bet that makes him so stiff.
if you haven't seen this chick, google her. it's horrible.
Rutgers women's basketball captain Essence Carson, i'll have nightmares for weeks.
well duh, i knew they were gonna accept me again, but i found out for sure today. i checked online and i've been accepted for re-entry into georgia state for the fall. i can pack up all my stuff sometime before the first of august, move in with vickey and start going to school full time. i have enough money saved up to go there as an out of state student for at least two semesters, without financial aid, but when i get financial aid, i can stretch out the money i have now to like two, maybe three years. but after the first year, i'll be considered in state, so that'll take a load off. plus my dad's gonna help me out.
i still haven't heard back from uncc and it's been weeks, but i think i already know what i'm gonna do. i've wasted enough time lounging around. it's time to get serious and get back in there. then after i graduate, i'm either going to morehouse school of medicine or usu (uniformed serviecs university) where they pay for every single dime of your tuition and fees. it's up in maryland, you go to school for free, and get paid a yearly salary while in school, but you have to do at least 7 years after your residency in either the army, navy, air force or public health service, as a doctor, which isn't half bad. so i'm halfway there knowing what i want to do with my life now. i'm still thinking it over.
i am so excited! i gotta start packing soon. charlotte is so lame. good riddance.
jenny
oh, and i'm getting a second car. i am so excited about it. it's not gonna a newer car, but it's still pretty decent. we all can't be big ballers, living with someone for free and going out and getting expensive cars. only the exceptional can pull that off. but i'll be ballin with two cars though. that's so cool, i'm so proud of myself. and it has HEAT! my pontiac doesn't have heat and so anyone who wants to ride with me in the winter had to bundle up, maybe grab a comforter or something. but my new car has heat. that's the one thing i wanted. so i'll ride the new car in the winter and the pontiac in the summer cause my pontiac's air ain't no joke. it's really good.
but enough about my cars...i've been thinking over what i wanted to do. so i applied to uncc and gsu. i know i'm getting into both, but i'm still not sure where i want to go. but i know for sure, that i am going back to school in august. without this job holding me up anymore, it's my only option. i'm not gonna stay out of school for a $9 an hour job. i'm gonna go full time, so i have to either get a roommate or if i go to atlanta, stay with vickey and if i stay here, i might have to move back in with my dad, i'd really rather not do that. so atlanta is looking really good right about now. let's see, here's how it weights out....
ATLANTA
i get to live rent free with vickey while i finish up school
i have a lot of friends there
i love atlanta
there's a lot of good lucking guys in atlanta
sam will probably be moving to atlanta in the next two years
CHARLOTTE
charlotte sucks
i don't have friends in charlotte
i'll have to pay rent
there's not that many cute guys here
sam will probably be moving to atlanta in the next two years
the only hesitation i have about atlanta is that if something happens with vickey and her situation whereas i'm out of a place to stay because vickey's living situation hasn't really been stable. and i won't have a full time job, just a part time thing. i don't know. i still have a few weeks to think about it though.
anyways, i better find something better to do with my time right now. i'm gonna get back to work. peace out.
jenny
Monday, April 09, 2007
- buy mansions in new york, new jersey, atlanta, miami and somewhere in new mexico, maybe albuquerque.
- pay to finish school, both undergraduate and medical school.
- pay for sam, darnell, and anyone i care abuot to go to any school they wanted to.
- buy my dad, vickey, and my mom houses.
- buy sam, my dad, vickey, my mom, all my brothers and sisters, some of my friends and darnell a car.
- fund an extensive underground bomb-shelter type building stocked with many animals, plants, food, water, entertainment systems, just necedssary stuff, you know, just make it really luxurious, just in case some shit goes down and i need to take a few people under for a few years.
- take a cross country trip around the united states for like a month.
- visit new mexico for a few weeks (the one place i've never been, but always wanted to go).
- pay to get some key people really knocked the fuck out...
...more to come.
peace out bitches.
jennifer
Sunday, April 08, 2007
Saturday, April 07, 2007
but right now, my head is banging. the lady did my cornrows sooo tight.
i did my taxes today and i'm getting like $1500 back, so that's great, since i'll be out of a job in a matter of days. i'm so glad vickey will let me stay with her for free.
i've been thinking about what i want to do with my life. i want to move back to atlanta, finish school. go to school full time, even take summer courses to catch up as much as i can. go to optical school (they make like 180k a year, i can handle that) maybe join the army or marines as an optometrist after i get my phd in optometry, then adopt a little boy. that's what i want to do, cause i know i won't be having sex within any of that time, but who knows, maybe i'll find the one. single and in atlanta, that's hot. then i have a lot of single friends in atlanta too, even hotter.
future's lookin bright for ya girl.
peace out bitches.
jenny
and today, i'm getting my hair did. getting out of this fro and into some braids. i'm excited about how it'll turn out. i won't be seeing my real hair for a long time. months. maybe a couple years to really let it grow back out.
ok, well i got up at like two this morning because i didn't work on friday so i slept all day and when 2 a.m. rolled around, i was back up. it's gonna be a long day. i'm gonna have to take a break this afternoon and come take a nap or something. well, i have to pick out hte fro. peace out blogspot.
jennifer
Friday, April 06, 2007
i'm done complaining. i'm just happy i still have my smile. hair will come and go, but a smile and a face is forever. don't ever forget that. a pickle face is for life. and i can't possibly imagine kissing a face that looks like a pickle (crystal) just because it has long hair coming out of it. i can't imagine kissing a face that looks like a jack-o-lantern (laneesha) for the rest of my life with nappy hair coming out of it. and i can't imagine a face that really closely resembles a great silver back baboon (sarah) every morning. gross. but hey, some dummies (lamar) are into weird shit like that. more power to them. they must have stomachs of steel.
jenny
Thursday, April 05, 2007
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
it seems like everybody's coming home from school this weekend. a FEW people actually want to meet up with me and hang out with me this weekend. can you believe that? and sam's gonna be in atlanta for spring break. finally, i get a chance to meet up with old acquaintances.
so next weekend, i should be in atlanta too. a three day weekend for me, so i can go to georgia state and take care of some business. i really need to be down there friday morning cause i have a lot to do if i want to start there soon.
ok, well i'm gonna go on to work, for one of the last times at this place. peace out.
jenny
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
jenny
ok, so i'm felling a lot more better and optimistic today. thanks a bunch to a great new kick ass boyfriend that i don't speak enough about, but we're just tring to keep this low-key. you know i think about you though baby.
all right, i need to stop messing around and get ready for work.
oh yeah, i joined facebook. i have so many friends on there now. people i went to middle school with, high school, worked with, it's so cool. i know more people on facebook than myspace. myspace is all about random dudes wanting to holla, facebook is all about my friends. reconnecting with people. lamar dropped me as his friend on there. that loser didn't find me worthy enough to see all of his page. i'll never understand that jerk, but thankfully, i'll never have to. i really don't know what's the deal, i'm not even his girlfriend. i'm just a chick who wanted to check out his page. but i know it's only because he knows i'll find out so many awful things about him that he did. but what the hell does he care? you did me wrong, everybody else sees the inappropriate comments, let me see them. but he's being a bitch about it and there's nothing i can do. truthfully, i don't need to see it to know what went down.
on that note, i won't be talking about "douche bag" lamar anymore and that's a promise. unless he does something really really really stupid. which i don't doubt.
ok, peace out.
jenny
Monday, April 02, 2007
Sunday, April 01, 2007
Saturday, March 31, 2007
it's like 6 in the morning. i work up about an hour ago and couldn't go back to sleep. i have a long day, lots to do, so i'm gonna go get myself together now. i'll holla. peace out.
jenn
Friday, March 30, 2007
hopefully today will go by pretty quick.
ok, i'm gonna finish getting ready for work. peace out bitch.
jennifer
Thursday, March 29, 2007
well the sweetest thing happened to me yesterday. i was at the store playing the powerball right and i'm leaving...this little boy goes out the store before me and doesn't realize that i'm leaving behind him. so he walks out the door and i have to like catch the door so it doesn't close on me and he's like, my bad and goes and holds the door for me. this little boy is like three or four. he was with his dad. i thought it was so cute.
it just made me realize...i'm about to be 22, i really wish i was in a different place with my life. i would love to have a family right about now. i would love to have a COMMITTED guy and a little boy. that's how i feel. that's what i want. i don't know, i guess i have nothing but time. but if i want to have 20 kids, i was thinking, i really need to be getting started soon.
well i gotta find the dude first then i can worry about the family part. maybe i can adopt a little boy as a single parent. i'm gonna look into that.
holla y'all.
jenny
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
anyways, well, me and lamar broke up again. did i already say that? well we broke up again back in september and we finally FINALIZED it last month when i kicked his ass out. at first, i was sad. yeah, for about two days, then i got angry, now i'm just at peace. out of the five years we were together, i swear to god, this is the first time that it's felt like it really was over between us and i'm not even sad about it. i'm just really happy and excited and anxious to be with somebody new.
i mean, i know i'm a pretty girl, i'm smart, what guy wouldn't want me? and i'm a virgin...what sane guy wouldn't want that? and what stupid guy would fuck that up? well lamar did, but he was...special is the word i guess. i guess he thought he was too cute or what ever the hell he thought he was, to treat me with any kind of respect. i guess he thought i should kiss his ass like those ugly little girls that just LOVED him up in new jersey. that idiot must not have known that i was in a totally different class than those monkeys. he should have been kissing my ass.
but it's all good. i've moved on. i'm hopeful for the future. i know i'll find the guy that's for me. lamar wasn't THE ONE for me, so it's gonna be fun trying to find him. or maybe it's a her. but i hope it's a him.
peace out blogger. i'll holla atcha tomorrow. we have a lot of catching up to do.
holla,
jenn
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
Friday, September 15, 2006
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
I'm the girl who will put her head on your shoulder, not because she's sleepy, but because she wants to be closer to you...
I'm the girl who likes to be kissed in the rain, more than inside your bedroom or in an expensive resturant...
I'm the girl who says,"ok, but you owe me..." jokingly not because I actually want something, but because it means I get to spend more time with you...I
'm the girl you can take absolutely anywhere and I will (or at least try to) have fun because it means I am spending time with you...
I'm the girl who is incredibly picky, but when I find someone I like I want to spend the whole night curled up in their arms...
I'm the girl who never forgets all the little things you do for me...
I'm the girl who never gives up hope even when I tell others I have...
I'm the girl who once I let you into my heart, there's ALWAYS a place there with your name on it. And even if we spend time apart, I'm the girl who never forgets you.
I'm the girl who loves to end a hug with a kiss...
I'm the girl who you can talk to about anything...I
'm the girl who laughs at your jokes...
I'm the girl who will have many inside jokes with you and will remember each one...
I'm the girl who will listen to you talk...
I'm the girl who really does want to be friends after a break up...
I'm the girl who loves it when you hug me for no apparent reason...
I'm the girl who loves it when you hug me from behind or kiss me on the forehead...
I'm the girl who loves you for you, and doesn't care what other people say about us...
I'm the girl who loves it when you introduce me to your friends as your girlfriend...
I'm the girl who loves the feeling when you take me by the hand without saying a word...
SWEET HEARTED GIRLS : If you are this girl repost this saying "I'm this girl"
DUDES: If you want this girl repost "I want this Girl"
LUCKY BASTARDS: repost "I have this girl"
but i guess i'll get over it
good to be single again though, i gotta say. i get to start something brand new with someone brand new. it's all good.
i won't go into it now, but i'll just say that i will never look at men the same again, i swear. but if i did learn anything, ladies, have sex with your boyfriends. even if you don't feel comfortable doing it or have had any kind of bad sexual experiences, who cares. that's the only way to keep them around.
but i'm just being bitter now. i guess in the end, it was all my fault.
wow, i can't stop thinking about how it happend, how long it took, all these little details that i need to let go of.
but anyways, oh yeah, i'm on myspace now. finally, everybody keeps telling me.
ok, so i'm going to work now. i'll holla!
jenny
Monday, September 11, 2006
Monday, September 04, 2006
'love and marriage, love and marriage,
goes together like peas and carrots'
of course the words are...
'love and marriage, love and marriage,
goes together like a horse and carriage'.
i thought it was so hilarious. anyway, i shall holla.
Saturday, August 26, 2006
i was on this school bus that had like two or three kids on it. black kids. i was like 'why are there only three kids on here and where's the bus driver?' so i get off the bus and there were like two hundred black people gathered outside at like a park or something. and it was sunny outside and there was nothing but black people walking around. so i start walking around, just seeing where the heck i was and what the heck was going on. so i'm about to get on the bus when out of nowhere, there's like 3 or 4 white people that walk up with shotguns. this one white dude, i guess he was the leader, he had all these black tattoss all over his back and his arms and face. and on the back of his head. he had on a white t-shirt and white shorts. they all had skinheads and had on white shorts and shirts. well he goes up to this one dude who has a kid on his shoulders. he aims the gun and at the little boy on his dad's shoulders and the boy just smiles at the gun like it's a camera. and it takes the white dude so long to pop off the shot. it takes him like a whole minute to get it out and he just shoots the little boy's head off. there's blood everywhere. and the weird part was, everyone just kept right on like nothing happened. the black people just kept on doing what they were doing. walking around, talkin, doing whatever. so these few white guys just start shooting these black people and they don't do anything. just keep going. and it takes them so long to pop off one shot. like, it should only take a second to pull the trigger, but it takes them a full minute or so to do a single shot. so i get back on the bus, cause apparently i'm the only one who notices that these white guys are killing folks. why i didn't shout and warn everybody, i don't know. but i get back on the bus and try to save these kids. i only see one little black boy left on there. so i go over to his seat and hear the door opening. its a white woman with a gun, one of them, so i grab the boy, get on the floor under the seat and see these dead black kids all on the floor. we hide under the seat as she walks down the aisle to the back door. as she's checking the handle to the back door to see if it was locked, i sneak up behind her and hit her in the head and knock her out. i take the gun and the little boy, sneak out the back door of the bus, then that's was it. that's all i remember.
that was really the weirdest dream i have ever had in my life. i was so disturbed by it. anyways, it's 5:20 and i have been up all night. i'm gonna go to sleep now and hopefully not have any dreams like that tonight. excuse me, this morning. i'll holla.
jenny
Friday, August 25, 2006
Saturday, August 19, 2006
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Friday, August 11, 2006
i'm planning on going to atlanta during labor day weekend and getting loose. i'm planning on getting a couple more tattoos and piercings. ooh, can't wait. i'm gonna wait one more week though so i can be absolutely sure.
anyways, i'll holla.
jenny
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
i just realize that i've actually kissed four guys. the fourth guy, who could forget madison.
nobody really knows this story but lamar. i haven't even told riche.
when i was living in college park, i was working in riverdale at value village and i had this one boss there. madison. madison was like 19 years older than me or something like that we had the same birthday, april 22. he was really short too, like my height, 5'3. he would always flirt with me at work and i would flirt with him. you know, just playing around. so you know, on the last day that i worked there, the day before i left to go back to charlotte, me, madison, and a few girls from work go to this sports bar to hang out and celebrate and whatever, have a one last get together before i left. so we drink, well they drink, i was 19. we eat, listen to music, have great conversation. it was so much fun. so after a couple hours or however long it was, we all decide to leave, to go home. so of course i don't have a car and walk wherever i need to go, and it's kinda late, so madison offers to take me home. ok, great, i don't have to walk, but i knew it was coming and i knew what was gonna happen when he dropped me off.
so we're talking on the way back to my apartment. random stuff. and when we get there, he said something like, 'can i get a kiss?' or 'can i taste those lips' or something like that. so i lean over and we start kissing and it's just really weird. it wasn't the worst, but it was weird. then it got worse when he stuck his big wet tongue in my mouth. gross. so after a little wihle of that, i pull away and am like "well i'm gonna go now". and he was like 'one more' and so i went in again and kissed for a little bit then that was it.
and the thing that's so bad was, he was like 37 and had two kids and was married! oh my god, i am such a slut. that's so funny. it's actually really sad. and he actually thought he was gonna go upstairs with me and have sex. that dude was really out of it. so, yeah, that was the fourth.
so maybe the fifth will be better. i'm counting on it.
so i was thinking about all the different guys i've kissed. just 3. well, i was thinking about the first guy i kissed. that was bad. it was really bad. i was in the tenth grade and he was my boyfriend. he was in the ninth grade though. i know, i know. anyways, he was walking me to my bus...i know i know...and it was raining and he leaned in and started kissing me and oh my god. the worst kiss ever. he had these huge lips, which i loved, but he just didn't know how to work it. it was wet and sloppy, no tongue, just lips and...ugh! well anyways, his name is dekarl and he has a baby by a white girl now. and to think, it could've been me. anyways, that lasted 8 days. and that was the only kiss.
so the second guy, daniel, i initiated that one. we were at the mall hanging out and we're walking through like jc penny or something. and i take us into a dressing room and just like took advantage of him. it was the first time for me with tongue, so that was cool. it wasn't great, but it was pretty ok. defintely better than that first one. that was the first of many with him. it was good, but there just had to be something better. that lasted like 7 months i think. he broke up with me to be with this girl that me and riche hate. i don't even think the girl is cute, but whatever. his loss. like two months later, i got with #3.
lamar...#3. so far, he's been the best kisser. see how i said 'so far'. uh huh. no, he's the best. the first time was like a month and a half after we started going out. yeah, everybody knows i like to take things really really slowly. so we were up in like some extra room in his 'step mom's' house and scary movie was on the tv and that's where it was. not the best kiss ever, but the best first kiss i'd had. and they only kept getting better from there.
so i'm thinking, it keeps getting better with each guy, i need to be doing something here. having some fun. why not? i'm only 21. and it's only kissing. no harm in that right? i like that idea.
Saturday, August 05, 2006
Saturday, July 29, 2006
Friday, July 28, 2006
Thursday, July 27, 2006
so i was as lovecalculator.com where they "calculate the probability of a successful relationship" just by typing in two people's full names. so i did some calculations and here are my findings:
jennifer euniec anderson and lamar tonsul = 29%
jennifer eunice anderson and darnell jefferson = 15%
jennifer eunice anderson and gavin shawn degraw = 82%
lamar tonsul and crystal roseboro = 74%
lamar tonsul and "his lady friend from new jersey" = 67%
interesting.
holla.
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
Thursday, May 18, 2006
yep, but anyways, today i'll go buy some drugs and hopefully i'll start feeling a little better soon.
all right then, i'll holla.
jenn
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
we were in brooklyn. i saw china town, little italy, a whole lotta stuff.
anyways, ive been sick since i got back. i caught something while i was up there. i'm trying to get rid of it now.
that's it. i'll holla!
jenny