i just read my very first blog post from back in march 2003 and...wow. lol, how i have changed. i cannot believe i felt those things and used those words and...wow. now i gotta go back and read the entire thing.

i saw stephen king's the mist yesterday. it was really really good. now i gotta see that new will smith movie that comes out next month..."i am legend" or something like that. i can't wait. maybe i can see that with torrey before he goes home for the winter break. aww, that's gonna make me sad, but at least sam will be here while he's gone. i may go to florida for the week before christmas. i haven't seen them all in a long long while.

ok, i'm going now. peace homies.

jennifer

it's thanksgiving today, sam is here, and we are bored as hell. nothing at all is open on thanksgiving. so we're sitting around the room looking at each other.

torrey called me back last night too and talked to me for about an hour. he's down in americus, georgia with his family. this guy is unbelievable. it's so not what i'm used to.

i think i might give up this blog soon. i always say that but then i keep coming back. it's good to write down what's happening to you every day. you can look back and be like, i felt like that? i said that? i was in love with him? but yeah...torrey has a journal that he writes in every day. almost every day. he lets me look at it sometimes. it's kinda cool.

so anyways, i gotta go find something to do. i'll holla bitches.

jenn

my boyfriend went home for thanksgiving...and i miss him so much already. he hasn't even been gone for 24 hours yet. this is crazy fast. he even called me and talked to me for a long time when he got home. lamar never ever ever ever ever called me and talked to me when he went out of town. like he was ashamed of me or something. or had better things to do. whatever. ok, gotta go. peace out.

jennifer

this new thing i have going on...its moving so fast. much faster than any other relationship i've been in before. me and torrey spend so much time together. i'm up in his room, it seems like now, like every day. we don't even do much. just talk, laugh, make jokes, make out, he cooks for me, then i go home. it's a great arrangement we got going on.

so he's a really good kisser. like i said before, with each new person i kiss, they rate higher and higher on the list. so far, torrey is at the top. he's just so passionate about it. it's really good. he gets me really hot. so i'm not so sure i'll be making it to 23 as a virgin. i think i need to go ahead and knock this one out. i don't want to lose another guy because of sex. i'm too old to be losing a guy because i'm not ready for sex. i just have to suck it up, maybe have a drink or two, and get it done. well, he does get me hot, so maybe i don't need a couple of drinks first.

torrey's from americus, georgia...which is like a half hour from where my mom was born in montezuma, georgia. he says he's been to montezuma several times and knows exactly where it is. he's a really sensitive dude too. i could really fall for him. he's not too tall, but he's taller than me, so i guess he can get a couple points for that. he's not light skinned, thank god, but he's not dark either. he's not thick either. he's really cut though and works out a lot. his abs are so shaped and defined...it's hot.

he likes when i kiss his neck and behind his ears...his hot spot...i found it already. he also likes opening his eyes when we're kissing and looking at me. i've caught him staring a few times. it's kinda weird, but hey, it's his thing, not mine. when i come over...he ALWAYS cooks for me and lets me watch whatever i want on his tv (which really takes my breath away). i don't know, he's just really cool. we're moving along pretty fast, so i'm thinking sex is in the near future. he's tried to give me...well...service me, but i couldn't do it. but i serviced him and he was not into it. i mean, he...completed...but he said i was too rough and that it just wasn't for him. i did read in cosmo that like 9% of all dudes aren't into that at all though, so i can't be too mad at it. when i was doing it, he put his hands in my hair and moved my head up and down and told me what he liked and what felt good and gave me feedback and was moaning, so that was new...different. but he didn't tell me that he was gonna cum soon enough and i got a bit in my mouth...which i wasn't surprisngly too mad about. i did spit that shit out though. i am not into swallowing. so anyway, i don't think that's gonna be happening too much more often. i think lamar enjoyed it anyways when i did it. but yeah...i need to try out a few more guys and get a general consensus on what most dudes like. i just don't think torrey is into...being serviced...cause i know i was working it. but WHATEVER!!!

so i'm gonna go get ready now. torrey's cooking for me again, so i'm going over to his place. i'm thinking i may need to stop by the gas station and pick up a condom or two. things always get so hot and heavy. they've been getting hotter and heavier every time i see him. he likes running his hands in my hair and along my face and back and butt and waist when we make out. just kissing and caressing. it's so different than what i'm used to. it's crazy. anyways, i gotta go shower and put on some "nice" panties just in case. i need to let go of my inhibitions. the world is ending in just five years and there's so much i want...need to get done. wish me luck.

jennifer