wow, i haven't blogged in almost two months. myspace has just taken all my time. well i'm gonna start blogging again.

so...what's up? i don't really have anything to say right now, so...

...i'll holla!

jenny

wow, it's been a whole month, wassup?

sorry blogger, but i have something to say. i've been cheating on you with myspace.

i know i haven't called or talked in a while, but i promise to hit you up later ok?

all righty then, i'll holla.

jenny

i cannot get enough of myspace.

my myspace page


it's so great.

i'm hooked.

holla,

jenny

I'M THIS GIRL!!! ...one day, some lucky guy will find that out.


I'm the girl who will put her head on your shoulder, not because she's sleepy, but because she wants to be closer to you...

I'm the girl who likes to be kissed in the rain, more than inside your bedroom or in an expensive resturant...

I'm the girl who says,"ok, but you owe me..." jokingly not because I actually want something, but because it means I get to spend more time with you...I

'm the girl you can take absolutely anywhere and I will (or at least try to) have fun because it means I am spending time with you...

I'm the girl who is incredibly picky, but when I find someone I like I want to spend the whole night curled up in their arms...

I'm the girl who never forgets all the little things you do for me...

I'm the girl who never gives up hope even when I tell others I have...

I'm the girl who once I let you into my heart, there's ALWAYS a place there with your name on it. And even if we spend time apart, I'm the girl who never forgets you.

I'm the girl who loves to end a hug with a kiss...

I'm the girl who you can talk to about anything...I

'm the girl who laughs at your jokes...

I'm the girl who will have many inside jokes with you and will remember each one...

I'm the girl who will listen to you talk...

I'm the girl who really does want to be friends after a break up...

I'm the girl who loves it when you hug me for no apparent reason...

I'm the girl who loves it when you hug me from behind or kiss me on the forehead...

I'm the girl who loves you for you, and doesn't care what other people say about us...

I'm the girl who loves it when you introduce me to your friends as your girlfriend...

I'm the girl who loves the feeling when you take me by the hand without saying a word...

SWEET HEARTED GIRLS : If you are this girl repost this saying "I'm this girl"

DUDES: If you want this girl repost "I want this Girl"

LUCKY BASTARDS: repost "I have this girl"

my heart is broken. i've never ever felt this way before.

but i guess i'll get over it

good to be single again though, i gotta say. i get to start something brand new with someone brand new. it's all good.

i won't go into it now, but i'll just say that i will never look at men the same again, i swear. but if i did learn anything, ladies, have sex with your boyfriends. even if you don't feel comfortable doing it or have had any kind of bad sexual experiences, who cares. that's the only way to keep them around.

but i'm just being bitter now. i guess in the end, it was all my fault.

wow, i can't stop thinking about how it happend, how long it took, all these little details that i need to let go of.

but anyways, oh yeah, i'm on myspace now. finally, everybody keeps telling me.

ok, so i'm going to work now. i'll holla!

jenny

oh, i feel so sad, so mad, so pissed, so depressed. but it's all good, i'll get over it.

i try to be the good guy and do a good thing, but i get screwed. or someone else does. whatever.

i'll holla.

jenn

sam was trying to sing the theme song to married with children...you know, "love andmarriage" by frank sinatra i think. well she's trying to sing it and goes...

'love and marriage, love and marriage,
goes together like peas and carrots'

of course the words are...

'love and marriage, love and marriage,
goes together like a horse and carriage'.

i thought it was so hilarious. anyway, i shall holla.

i had this really weird, bad dream last night.

i was on this school bus that had like two or three kids on it. black kids. i was like 'why are there only three kids on here and where's the bus driver?' so i get off the bus and there were like two hundred black people gathered outside at like a park or something. and it was sunny outside and there was nothing but black people walking around. so i start walking around, just seeing where the heck i was and what the heck was going on. so i'm about to get on the bus when out of nowhere, there's like 3 or 4 white people that walk up with shotguns. this one white dude, i guess he was the leader, he had all these black tattoss all over his back and his arms and face. and on the back of his head. he had on a white t-shirt and white shorts. they all had skinheads and had on white shorts and shirts. well he goes up to this one dude who has a kid on his shoulders. he aims the gun and at the little boy on his dad's shoulders and the boy just smiles at the gun like it's a camera. and it takes the white dude so long to pop off the shot. it takes him like a whole minute to get it out and he just shoots the little boy's head off. there's blood everywhere. and the weird part was, everyone just kept right on like nothing happened. the black people just kept on doing what they were doing. walking around, talkin, doing whatever. so these few white guys just start shooting these black people and they don't do anything. just keep going. and it takes them so long to pop off one shot. like, it should only take a second to pull the trigger, but it takes them a full minute or so to do a single shot. so i get back on the bus, cause apparently i'm the only one who notices that these white guys are killing folks. why i didn't shout and warn everybody, i don't know. but i get back on the bus and try to save these kids. i only see one little black boy left on there. so i go over to his seat and hear the door opening. its a white woman with a gun, one of them, so i grab the boy, get on the floor under the seat and see these dead black kids all on the floor. we hide under the seat as she walks down the aisle to the back door. as she's checking the handle to the back door to see if it was locked, i sneak up behind her and hit her in the head and knock her out. i take the gun and the little boy, sneak out the back door of the bus, then that's was it. that's all i remember.

that was really the weirdest dream i have ever had in my life. i was so disturbed by it. anyways, it's 5:20 and i have been up all night. i'm gonna go to sleep now and hopefully not have any dreams like that tonight. excuse me, this morning. i'll holla.

jenny

it's hard not to cry at the end of "my girl".

i've noticed that if i sleep by myself, i always wake up in the middle of the night and stay up for a couple of hours. i go to bed earlier too.

but if someone is with me, i always sleep through the night.

hmm.

sam and i are driving down the road at night in complete silence and sam goes:


'if i hit a dog, i would be really shaken up about it.'

ohhh.....k.k.k.

jenny

so...wassup boo? that's how i always answer the phone when vickey calls and she hates it, but i can't help it.

i noticed that i stop blogging once lamar comes around. but i'm not gonna do that anymore. gavin degraw might be stopping by my blog one day and notice that i haven't written in a while and decide not to be with me. but anyway, getting back to reality, i have to go to work now. nothing really to blog about today.

i'm planning on going to atlanta during labor day weekend and getting loose. i'm planning on getting a couple more tattoos and piercings. ooh, can't wait. i'm gonna wait one more week though so i can be absolutely sure.

anyways, i'll holla.

jenny

RANDOM PICS

extreme close up (that's how an eye is supposed to look, but i was holding it wide open. my eyes don't stay open that wide like that.)
taking a snooze?
mustache?
cool?
cool wal-mart bag purse right? and it holds to much.

SAM AND JENNY F*%$ING AROUND

me messing around
sam getting toasted
prince toasted
way too much free time

KISSES PART II


i just realize that i've actually kissed four guys. the fourth guy, who could forget madison.

nobody really knows this story but lamar. i haven't even told riche.

when i was living in college park, i was working in riverdale at value village and i had this one boss there. madison. madison was like 19 years older than me or something like that we had the same birthday, april 22. he was really short too, like my height, 5'3. he would always flirt with me at work and i would flirt with him. you know, just playing around. so you know, on the last day that i worked there, the day before i left to go back to charlotte, me, madison, and a few girls from work go to this sports bar to hang out and celebrate and whatever, have a one last get together before i left. so we drink, well they drink, i was 19. we eat, listen to music, have great conversation. it was so much fun. so after a couple hours or however long it was, we all decide to leave, to go home. so of course i don't have a car and walk wherever i need to go, and it's kinda late, so madison offers to take me home. ok, great, i don't have to walk, but i knew it was coming and i knew what was gonna happen when he dropped me off.

so we're talking on the way back to my apartment. random stuff. and when we get there, he said something like, 'can i get a kiss?' or 'can i taste those lips' or something like that. so i lean over and we start kissing and it's just really weird. it wasn't the worst, but it was weird. then it got worse when he stuck his big wet tongue in my mouth. gross. so after a little wihle of that, i pull away and am like "well i'm gonna go now". and he was like 'one more' and so i went in again and kissed for a little bit then that was it.

and the thing that's so bad was, he was like 37 and had two kids and was married! oh my god, i am such a slut. that's so funny. it's actually really sad. and he actually thought he was gonna go upstairs with me and have sex. that dude was really out of it. so, yeah, that was the fourth.

so maybe the fifth will be better. i'm counting on it.

JENNY AND LAMAR

that was me and lamar in new jersey last december
aww, so cute
aww, the only picture i have of us together
lamar trying to attack me
he won

KISSES

so i was thinking about all the different guys i've kissed. just 3. well, i was thinking about the first guy i kissed. that was bad. it was really bad. i was in the tenth grade and he was my boyfriend. he was in the ninth grade though. i know, i know. anyways, he was walking me to my bus...i know i know...and it was raining and he leaned in and started kissing me and oh my god. the worst kiss ever. he had these huge lips, which i loved, but he just didn't know how to work it. it was wet and sloppy, no tongue, just lips and...ugh! well anyways, his name is dekarl and he has a baby by a white girl now. and to think, it could've been me. anyways, that lasted 8 days. and that was the only kiss.

so the second guy, daniel, i initiated that one. we were at the mall hanging out and we're walking through like jc penny or something. and i take us into a dressing room and just like took advantage of him. it was the first time for me with tongue, so that was cool. it wasn't great, but it was pretty ok. defintely better than that first one. that was the first of many with him. it was good, but there just had to be something better. that lasted like 7 months i think. he broke up with me to be with this girl that me and riche hate. i don't even think the girl is cute, but whatever. his loss. like two months later, i got with #3.

lamar...#3. so far, he's been the best kisser. see how i said 'so far'. uh huh. no, he's the best. the first time was like a month and a half after we started going out. yeah, everybody knows i like to take things really really slowly. so we were up in like some extra room in his 'step mom's' house and scary movie was on the tv and that's where it was. not the best kiss ever, but the best first kiss i'd had. and they only kept getting better from there.

so i'm thinking, it keeps getting better with each guy, i need to be doing something here. having some fun. why not? i'm only 21. and it's only kissing. no harm in that right? i like that idea.

RANDOM PICS

this was someting around last christmas
new years eve of course.
getting the party started
around christmas again (that's some great hair)
this was someting around christmas. must have been talking to someone exciting.

i don't know man, i just don't know.

JENNY IN ATLANTA PART II

this is (from left to right) me, landon, vickey, sam and aunt patricia
we had to do this one twice cause landon was acting up. (aren't my cheeks huge?)
vickey, sam and aun patricia, vickey's sister. (they have the same mom)
me, vickey and sam...i love this picture

JENNY IN ATLANTA PART I

i was playing with landon.

me getting "close" with landon (can't you tell that he loves it?)

me playing with landon some more. (that purse is so cute).

landon getting "close" with me. (i was so excited about that).

he was trying to get too close (what the heck was going on with my mouth here?)

CUJO

awww!

LOVECAUCLATOR.COM

so i was as lovecalculator.com where they "calculate the probability of a successful relationship" just by typing in two people's full names. so i did some calculations and here are my findings:

jennifer euniec anderson and lamar tonsul = 29%
jennifer eunice anderson and darnell jefferson = 15%
jennifer eunice anderson and gavin shawn degraw = 82%
lamar tonsul and crystal roseboro = 74%
lamar tonsul and "his lady friend from new jersey" = 67%


interesting.

holla.

GLAMOUR SHOTS

(yeah right)

this isn't my favorite, but i think it's ok.

i'm pretty sure i have on red lipstick here.

i really like this one, but it looks orange right?

ah, just right, but have a few hairs out of place. (not the ones on my head, j/k).

too much makeup

i love the angle on this one, but the makeup has me looking so fake.

wow, i have not blogged in so so long. two months? wow. well i just wanted to post some pics. and i need to start blogging more often. maybe i'll post a few pictures a day with a description with each. i have like over 100 pictures, so that'll keep me blogging for a while.

yo momma so fat, she needs mapquest just to find her neck.

jenn

i have been feeling so bad since i left new york. i have been so sick. i have a cold, i keep waking up with headaches, and my stomach has been killing me. i hope i'm not trying to catch the flu. i caught it when i was a junior in high school and had caught it the week of spring break. what great timing, or else i would have had to miss a whole week of school, it was that bad.

yep, but anyways, today i'll go buy some drugs and hopefully i'll start feeling a little better soon.

all right then, i'll holla.

jenn

so i got the digital camera hooked up now so i can start putting pictures on my blog. i'm so excited about that.

lost tonight. i'm so excited about that.

i need to get some health insurance. i'm so excited about that.

gotta get ready for work now. i'm so excited about that.

holla,
jenny

see, no kitchen darnell! get it straight.

jenn

i went to new york last weekend. it was so great. i might have to move there one day.

we were in brooklyn. i saw china town, little italy, a whole lotta stuff.

anyways, ive been sick since i got back. i caught something while i was up there. i'm trying to get rid of it now.

that's it. i'll holla!

jenny

lost is getting too good. can't wait till next week.

going to new york this weekend. hopefully i'll run into gavin degraw. that'll make my life.

ok, sleep now.

holla.

jenny

this has not been a good week for me. i just hope things start looking up for me.

jenny

yo breath so stank, it smell like you been eating ass chips.

i might be going to new york this coming weekend, but we'll see. lamar will be in new york too, but i feel i need to supervise him for some reason. no trust.

anyways, i'm gonna go now. i'll holla.

jenn

yo momma so old, she saw passion of the christ live.

jenny

yo momma so black, they use her bath water to dye bowling balls.

jenn

yo momma so fat, she sweat meat loaf sauce.

wassup!

so there's this guy at work, doc, who has this thing for me. he liked me a while back, but then i kept writing him up with errors and he backed off, but since he moved to another department at transunion, and i can't write him up anymore, he's been coming around again. everyday he comes by my desk and goes, "hey miss jennifer". i'm like "wassup". then he finds something to talk to me about. he even goes and pretends that he really wants to talk to this girl who's cube is next to mine, but everytime i look up, he's looking at me. when i catch him looking, i like lick my lips and start playing with my nipples. no, i'm just playing, i just smile and continue working right, cause what else could i do? so anyway, today, he tells me that he's going to the beach for memorial day weekend. i'm like, that's cool. and then he invites me to go. he says "i'm going to the beach and it would be so much more fun if i had a girl like jennifer go with me" or something like that. i'm like, "oh, i think i'm going to atlanta that weekend". it was kinda akward, but i gotta give it to him for trying. if i didn't have a boyfriend, i'd holla. just my type too. tall, dark and thick. i love it. this one day, he called himself trying to sneak up on me and scare me. he snuck up behind me and starting rubbing my shoulders while i was typing. that freaked me out sooo bad. i was just sitting there at my computer and then i felt hands on my shoulders. but we both got a good laugh out of it. he loves when i wear my hair down i've learned, so i try to wear it up more often. it's so funny. i haven't had someone have a crush on me in a long time. the last guy was that cop from riverdale at value village. i was so proud of that one. ok, gonna go to bed now. i'll holla.

jenn

lost is really getting hardcore. only three more episodes left this season. i am so much more excited than i should be.

hardcore. i use that word all the time now and my skantch sister sam thinks she can take every single word that i use. she's so lame.

anyway, i gotta go to work.

oh yeah, darnell looks just like that dude from the xbox games commercial that goes "can we have some now mummy?" doesn't he? it's so funny.

ok then, i'll holla.

jenn

whoops, forgot to this do for a few days. but anyways...

it's so disappointing to learn that someone else told your boyfriend that they loved him. but whatever, i guess since i wasn't saying it to him anymore, someone had to to make him feel good. it's a little upsetting, but oh well. he wasn't my boyfriend at the time (it was during our last month long split). but how do you tell someone you love them after, supposedly, one kiss and after only two weeks? he had to have been tappin that. i know it. there's no other way. one of these days, i'm gonna find a place that does lie detector tests and i already have two pages of questions i wanna ask him cause i don't think he's 100% with me. he likes to tell stories i think.

and then all day yesterday, i started thinking about how crystal told him something about liking him and he told her "well you shoulda said something". what the hell? how f-ing rude is that? and he gets mad when i think about it and bring it up, but i'm the one that should be mad. i deserve to get mad and have an attitude. all that shit he does. now i'm getting pissed off thinking about all that shit. i'm gonna be thinking about this crap all day and i really don't need this. i feel like i really don't deserve all that shit that he's done behind my back, or supposedly. i gotta go now. i started the blog feeling ok and now i'm like all riled up. i am so heated. so i'll holla.

jenny

i've been seeing my brother alan when i look at myself in the mirror lately. it's scary. i think me and alan look the most alike out of all 9 of my siblings.

but anyways...oh yeah, i keep forgetting to mention. i met little richard last saturday on my birthday. i will always remember what i did on my 21st birthday forever now. i just had the best weekend of my life. met little richard on saturday and had a really great time with lamar on sunday and monday. the only thing that will top that weekend would be just a second with gavin degraw. to just si 'hi' or something. though longer than a second would be much much better. that would be the highlight of my life. better than marriage or having kids and all of that shit. one day it'll happen.

so i'm gonna go to work now. holla.

jenn

they're sending josh to iraq in a month or so.

i'm going to florida to visit my mom and brothers and sister in a month or so.

i'm not sure what i'm gonna do about school.

i need to get lasik eye surgery soon.

i wanna lose like 10 punds.

i'm so confused about what i need to do right now.

all right, i'll holla.

jenn

so it's been like four months since my last blog and i really need to try to keep up with it this time around.

so, since december. lamar moved to charlotte. so exciting. he moved here in january. so january was great with him and so was february. i'm so happy around him. but then in march, he takes this job working 5 days a week in atlanta. catering for movies. well, whatever, i guess i have to deal with that. he'll do two movies back to back which will mean he'll be in atlanta until around august and come back to charlotte on the weekends. now he tells me he might be catering for ne-yo's tour this summer too which doesn't end until the end of september. so for two months, i won't see him. i know i've gone much longer than two months before, but i got so used to him being around for those couple of months. i just really hope they don't get to do this ne-yo thing. i'm praying for it. and i know that might be such a wrong thing to be praying for, but i just don't think him going around the country for two months will be a good thing for us. i won't be able to supervise him and i already don't trust him, so it'll be very interesting how this turns out. i think i kinda already know, but we'll see. and then we barely even talk during the week now cause he's so tired or busy, i know i won't hear from him at all if he goes on tour. no communication plus no trust equals a very very bad situation. so, i don't know.

anyway, i don't wanna get myself down again with that. on to something else.

in april, my birthday was last weekend, on the 22nd. i went to atlanta for the weekend to celebrate. the first two days, i was so bored out of my mind. me and my mom had plans to go out, but i decided to come on such short notice, that we hadn't really thought through everything. so our plans went bust. but...on sunday and monday, the best two days after my birthday that i've ever had. lamar really know how to make me feel good (not like that you sicko). he made me smile, he made me laugh, and i was just happy and having a good time.

i had gotten my nails done, my hair, fresh outfit, shoes, pedicure, just trying to look cute for my birthday weekend and mostly for lamar right. so we're all over atlanta the day after my b-day, on sunday, and i'm just gettin all kinds of looks from these dudes. oh yeah, gotta do that more often, dress up. anyway, i had fun. had to go home. sad about leaving lamar behind in atlanta.

anyways, so today, i was walking the dog and this dude tried to holla. and if i didn't have a boyfriend already, i woulda holla'd back. he wasn't a thug, he was dressed up like he had just gotten off a 9-5, slacks, button down shirt, tall, dark skinned. just looking fresh. i told him i had a boyfriend and he said that we could just be friends. but i told him i'd see him around. he lives in the same building as me, but a few rows down. i'll make sure to wear something cute whenever i walk the dogs now. i do need more friends.

but anyway, that's about it. i guess a good time to do this every day would be in the morning before work. that sounds like a plan. hope i can remember. i got a bad memory. so anyways, what was i saying? nothing. i'll holla.

jenn