Have you ever been with someone where you think that you're not home unless you're with them? I've never felt that way either till recently <3

1.5 years down, 2.5 years to go till that Dr. A status. Till that six figure status. Till that sports car in every color status. Till that mansion status. Till that swimming in a bathtub full of cash status. It's so close I can taste it. 

Boyfriend is at work so I'm tres bored right now. I'd like to take this time to confess my domino obsession. Since this summer, I've played almost 3,000 games (on my phone) and I can't put it down. I've been in all kinds of domino tournaments and almost won some money once. I've got a sickness. It's an addiction. But I've gotten SOO good though. Ok, bye!

Goals for 2014:

1. Get my weight up (currently 90 lbs)

2. Get a ring on it

3. Get pregnant (ok, these two are a stretch)

4. Get Instagram (am I the only one without one??)

5. Make more friends 

6. Enjoy my last year in my 20's!!!

7. Continue working out everyday and drinking my daily 50 oz. of water

8. Lay off the candy, cupcakes, cake, pizza, burgers, fries...all that crap. It's i eat!!! Do better girl!

9. Volunteer even more

10. Be a boss ass bitch

I love waking up looking into his green eyes...his body touching mine. That's my heart <3

I'm falling in love with smooth jazz. I like to study with it on and sleep with it on. It's soo soothing. Pandora has an awesome station. 

Was just scrolling through pics of all my brother's kids. I have 10 neices and nephews. Phew! My oldest brothers have kids, I was skipped, now my younger siblings are starting to have kids. I don't know what that says about me? Funny though, not one of my siblings is married though. I won't make that mistake at least :)

<3 <3 <3 Love the sound of his voice <3 <3 <3

What do I want for Christmas?? Hmm...two things come to mind. Money to help fund my mission trip to Haiti this summer or...a shiny diamond ring. Either or ;) If anyone is willing to make a contribution to either, hit me up :x

Yeah, I like to call my man at 3:00 in the morning and tell him I love him and miss him <3 <3 <3 #IgotAcrush

I'm so excited to be going on a week long mission trip to Haiti in May. Gonna go save some vision!

Super long day. I just wanted to go home and curl up in bed with my man as he rubbed my belly til I fell asleep. But I'm in Memphis and he's in Atlanta :( Love me some him.

Alone for Thanksgiving :(

Currently 92 lbs O_o

Missing my boo thang :(

Less than human :(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(

Craving lots of tiny kisses along my tiny ribcage. I've never wanted that before, but at this very moment...I want it xx

Really considering doing an externship in New Mexico. 

Love love love this song...

http://youtu.be/L_PS8wZNqrc

:) I never thought I'd actually have a sugar daddy. And I really never thought that sugar daddy would be my own boyfriend. It's kinda sexy :)

I've been getting all these spam comments on old posts on my blog. 😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡 I'm getting too much unwanted attention. Gonna have to go private soon. 

ScienceShot: Heavy Stubble Makes Men More Attractive - ScienceNOW

ScienceShot: Heavy Stubble Makes Men More Attractive - ScienceNOW

See, this is what I love. A man with a nice hairy face. There's something so masculine and testosterone-y about a beard and mustache. It's so sexy. My boyfriend has this really nice beard. He's light skinned so he has blonde hair and brown hair mixed in, so it's really cute. He had a goatee I think when we met, but I talked him into the full on beard and he's been that way since. He does like to shave it off though when we get into an argument. He says it has nothing to do with me but I know it does.

Anyway. Here it is. Scientific (somewhat) proof that women prefer facial hair on a man. We find it more sexy. Confirmed.

See ya!

I don't know. I'm doing something wrong. I've spent all of my adult life (even since I was 16) in a relationship and what do I have to show for it?? Certainly no ring on this finger. I'm almost 30!! That's almost 40!! I've had a boyfriend of 5 years with no intentions of popping the question and now this one of almost 4 years who got scared to death when I asked him about marriage. I've come to think that it must be me. Cause there are SOO many girls YOUNGER than me getting married, having kids, starting families. It's not fair! It's what I wanted for so long! I never wanted to be a 30 year old bride or mom. I really think I got the short end of the stick in this life. It's not fair. I just truly want a ring from someone who really wants to give me one and who I really want to get it from. I want to go ahead and settle down and start my family and be happy. I'm tired of waiting. 

Done venting now. In other news...I'm sleepy. Bye. 

So I have new boos now. Ryan Gosling, Jesse Williams, and the Hodge Twins. They can all get it ;)

Random thought at 1:00 am...I still haven't made it to Monroeville, PA.

Sometimes I just feel like a complete waste of space. I don't even know why I'm here.

I'm such a happier person when I'm in Atlanta. I don't care for memphis, but I have to put up with it for two more years :(

I need to let go and let god.

>:( still pissed ):<

Two more years at school in Tennessee and then one year of externships then I'll be Dr. A. I'm attractive, I'm smart, I'm funny, and fine, I have this weird thing going on with my weight where I keep losing pounds but it could be worse, I could be gaining. I'm gonna get that in check though one day soon. Actually I think I already have. I think I've topped off at about 100 lbs. So that's good. I haven't really gotten any lower than that yet. But I say all this to say that it's all good that my boyfriend would rather be single than to marry me. Whatevs!! I will be just fine. I have a lot going for myself cause if he doesn't want me, I can find a thousand guys that will line up around the block for me, ok!

Can you tell this whole thing has been bothering me for a few days?? Well it has! At first, I was like, whatevs, that's how you feel, that's fine. Then I was hurt, but now I'm really pissed. After what we went through with him telling his ex he wanted to marry her, I'm pissed. I'm pissed that he lets me be around his family, but would rather be single than marry me. This is why I don't discuss marriage with boyfriends. I never ever asked a previous boyfriend about marriage...ever. This was the first, and last, time. I knew I always wanted it with Lamar, but we never talked about it in the five, six years we were together. We had way too many problems. But me and Lance have been together three years and things have been going pretty good so I asked and boy did that go wrong. Never again.

Ok, well I want to be done talking about this now. Just wanted to get it off of my chest. *sigh*

My eyes are becoming clear 😳

I oftentimes think I don't get all the happiness I deserve :(

So I ask my boyfriend of three years about marriage and all of a sudden he wants to be single again. Interesting because this is the same guy who told his ex, behind my back while we were together, that he wanted to marry her and have her kids. That's ok. That just means I'm not the one and that's fine. I said that earlier. It's just now hitting home. And as 30 is fast approaching, I don't know, I feel like I have to do something about it soon.

And now I'm sure :( Oh well.

My boyfriend's mom thinks I look like Megan Goode (hadn't heard that in a while) but he says I look more like Brandy. He's hatin'.