so the thing i'm really gonna hate when torrey starts seeing somebody new is the fact that he's gonna cook for her. he's only supposed to cook for me. i've beenthinking about that lately and i'm not feeling that.

on another note...i think one of the reasons that i haven't had sex yet is cause i think i'll feel like such a dirty whore afterwards. like, i can't even imagine myself doing it. but like torrey said, there's not gonna be this magical moment where i just decide that, "hey, this is the moment. i really want to do this right now." cause that moment probably ain't gonna happen. i just need to commit to do it and let that be it. no second guessing it, no waiting on lord knows what.

it's just like, geeze louise. i'm gonna be 25 soon. that's 5 years til i'm 30. that's just unacceptable. i gotta make some changes...gotta make some things happen.

oh, and what i meant to talk about last time...
--i volunteered monday and had the best day all because of one little boy. i was at the IDP doing my volunteer thing and this little boy walks. he was like 4 or 5. so as soon as he walks in and sees me, he just smiles and waves at me. it was so cute. that was really the highlight of my day, my week even. it was nice.

ok well i'm sleepy now and i need to take a nap before work.

oh yeah, one more thing. so riche is trying to hook me up with another one of her friends. i told her that i MIGHT not be able to go to her halloween party where i'm supposed to meet this guy, so she's set up another little event at her place that she invited both of us to (and 15 other people). it's like an old school game night. scrabble, monopoly, twister ;) stuff like that. i really wanna go, but it's on a friday night. i work friday nights. i'm thinking about just going in to work late that night and going to riche's thing. it's usually slow friday nights anyways. i'm excited.

ok, ttfn.

jenny "you don't have any of your cop friends to help you keep your booze now" jenn jenn