I'm such a happier person when I'm in Atlanta. I don't care for memphis, but I have to put up with it for two more years :(

I need to let go and let god.

>:( still pissed ):<

Two more years at school in Tennessee and then one year of externships then I'll be Dr. A. I'm attractive, I'm smart, I'm funny, and fine, I have this weird thing going on with my weight where I keep losing pounds but it could be worse, I could be gaining. I'm gonna get that in check though one day soon. Actually I think I already have. I think I've topped off at about 100 lbs. So that's good. I haven't really gotten any lower than that yet. But I say all this to say that it's all good that my boyfriend would rather be single than to marry me. Whatevs!! I will be just fine. I have a lot going for myself cause if he doesn't want me, I can find a thousand guys that will line up around the block for me, ok!

Can you tell this whole thing has been bothering me for a few days?? Well it has! At first, I was like, whatevs, that's how you feel, that's fine. Then I was hurt, but now I'm really pissed. After what we went through with him telling his ex he wanted to marry her, I'm pissed. I'm pissed that he lets me be around his family, but would rather be single than marry me. This is why I don't discuss marriage with boyfriends. I never ever asked a previous boyfriend about marriage...ever. This was the first, and last, time. I knew I always wanted it with Lamar, but we never talked about it in the five, six years we were together. We had way too many problems. But me and Lance have been together three years and things have been going pretty good so I asked and boy did that go wrong. Never again.

Ok, well I want to be done talking about this now. Just wanted to get it off of my chest. *sigh*

My eyes are becoming clear 😳

I oftentimes think I don't get all the happiness I deserve :(

So I ask my boyfriend of three years about marriage and all of a sudden he wants to be single again. Interesting because this is the same guy who told his ex, behind my back while we were together, that he wanted to marry her and have her kids. That's ok. That just means I'm not the one and that's fine. I said that earlier. It's just now hitting home. And as 30 is fast approaching, I don't know, I feel like I have to do something about it soon.

And now I'm sure :( Oh well.

My boyfriend's mom thinks I look like Megan Goode (hadn't heard that in a while) but he says I look more like Brandy. He's hatin'.

Chicks my age either have a ring or a baby. I've always wanted both, but guess their not in my cards right now. Haven't met 'The One' yet I guess.

goes.

me lose weight. I've already lost a fifth of my body weight in four months. We'll see how it

Between August and December, I lost 25+ lbs. And I'm still losing. Going into the new year under 100 lbs. I'm on this medication for migraines and its making

I also need to start blogging again.

I used to laugh a lot. I'm gonna start doing that again.

I live in Tennessee now. Long story. Massive update blog on my hiatus coming soon.

-Jenny

Having my last morsel of sweetness (candy) and possibly writing my last blog before the start of Lent. May not be back til April. Cya suckas!

Tomorrow is Lent. What will I give up for the Lord? I'm thinking about sweets and blogging so if you don't hear from me til April, you know why (dang, and I had resolved to blog every day this year, too...but what's 40 days?). And another 40 days of just water and no red meat or chicken. After February is over, I'm gonna at least start having fish again.

-Jenn Jenn (more and more people have taken to calling me this lately. It's become my name of choice now of Vickey, Landon, and some people at work. I wonder when and how this all happened--and seemingly all at the same time). Cya.

I hate this job.

"I will never settle for being someone's second choice when I know that somewhere I am someone's first choice."